I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
operation have a gay friend backfired
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
