I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
