You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
