I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
