It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
