Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
