The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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