9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
that is very illegal...i love you.
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