just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
