My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
You took a bar mat shot.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
