talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
