I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
