i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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