I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
