you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
