so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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