You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Porn is love you can see.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
