did you get engaged???
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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