I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
