Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
