i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
