i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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