i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
areolas are like halos for boobs.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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