Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
