it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Randomize