how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
