Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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