Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
