She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
