You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Randomize
