I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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