Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize