My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
