This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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