okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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