He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
