So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
