Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She announced her abortion via fbk
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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