My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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