yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
They have beer where we have blood.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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