Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
