why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
why is half of my head shaved?
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