I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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