I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize