by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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