that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
