Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
