well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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