The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
