Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
